May 2011
207 posts
Gov. Christie arrives at son's high school... →
How many teachers’ salaries did that trip cost?
May 31st
May 31st
7 notes
I saw the Rolling Stones in 1989, and we thought...
I’m watching Shine a Light for the first time and it’s actually pretty good, which is surprising because I had sworn off live Rolling Stones because Mick is annoying and Keith is self-parody and that’s depressing. First, they should never do Sympathy live because it doesn’t work live and the version of Tumbling Dice here is so weirdly wrong that it makes me wonder if...
May 31st
May 31st
“Artists don’t have rights, they have duties.”
– Roberto Benigni (via themoviedoc) What? That’s like Mad Libs. Artists don’t have knees, they have giraffes.
May 31st
Has anything ever been more inevitable than Franzen writing that essay? Why did he get picked greatest white bro writer of his generation? DFW and Jeffrey Eugenides are far better, as far as I’m concerned. Do you think Rick Moody is lonely? Is Mark Leyner still alive?
May 31st
6 notes
May 31st
Bros talking about being bros, and doing bro stuff. Not comedy. It’s torture.
May 31st
I’m pretty sure I’ve never had more than 2 male friends at any one time in my life. 
May 31st
The only thing worse than spending a weekend with 4 guys would be seeing a movie about it.
May 31st
“e has not given any good reason for why he seemed to be in possession of the...”
– Casey Anthony Trial | George Anthony | Geraldo At Large | Mediaite What happened with that duct tape?
May 30th
“The defense’s case in the Casey Anthony murder trial increasingly slim,...”
– Casey Anthony Trial | George Anthony | Geraldo At Large | Mediaite Seriously, the editors are all dead right? This is like accidental Henry James.
May 30th
Summer movies are going to be escapist and sequels/reboots/remakes have been happening for centuries. Shakespeare was at least the 4th person to tell the story of Romeo and Juliet. Proust wrote 7 sequels. Stop with the tongue clucking at the decline of the West.
May 30th
8 notes
My son: Star Wars gets a timeout. Me: When did you see the Prequels?
May 29th
“More than a few New York City entrepreneurs were quick to point out that the...”
– Why New York City’s tech scene is thriving - TNW Industry Tech people! This is stupid. 
May 29th
4 notes
The people from Indianapolis on my Facebook account don’t realize that nobody outside of Indianapolis cares about the 500. It’s like a weird social experiment.
May 29th
BLOGGING via TYPEWRITER.: Dear iPad tablet... →
inothernews: Stop bragging about your $599 pricepoints and Flash capabilities as though those things will entice anyone away from an iPad. They won’t. For one, iPads start at $499 and already boast a 10-inch screen, so comparing any other specs on devices that already cost $100 more and are three diagonal…  Chromebooks!
May 26th
79 notes
Ryan Howard is MY American Idol
May 26th
Shouldn’t the Oprah thing have been a bigger deal?
May 26th
According to my Facebook feed, Indiana is about to get walloped by tornadoes. My worst nightmare when I grew up there. I hope everyone stays safe.
May 26th
Spotlight this.
I got your spotlight swinging.
May 25th
That's weird.
I can’t seem to find myself in the spotlight section. It’s cool. I’ll just email Karp on one of my iPads. We’re totally bros.
May 25th
Schools should fire incompetent teachers and...
May 24th
You guys didn’t know about that place Applebee’s? Totally wanked. I guess it’ll suck now because everyone found out about it.
May 24th
OUTRAGED! OUTRAGED, I SAY.
This. THIS.
May 24th
1 note
Seriously, though, I had Lenny Kravitz's first...
Hey Cabdriver was a righteous tune. You wouldn’t know it though. It’s pretty obscure.
May 24th
More People Would Become Incompetents if Teachers...
May 24th
However...
youngmanhattanite: If you’re a teacher and you aren’t teaching summer school, don’t complain to me about pay. You’re still gonna get most of August off, and anyway, summer school classes get out at 1, so you can start drinking plenty early. Unless you have young kids who are not in summer school. 
May 24th
The Movie Doc: Movie Trailer Analysis: The Muppets →
themoviedoc: Watch it here Target audience: It’s definitely a family movie, but probably oriented towards kids. Tone: It looks like it’s light and quite playful, but it’s normal because it’s a musical! Value: The trailer wants to pull a joke on us, but it falls flat. If that’s what to be… Jesus, is the internet going to destroy the Muppets too?  Maybe we should just disable all...
May 23rd
35 notes
“Your reputation may or may not be accurate. Others determine your reputation,...”
– Tony Dungy (via soupsoup) Ironically, Tony Dungy’s reputation for integrity is bullshit. He’s a virulent homophobe and otherwise full of shit.
May 23rd
I’m pretty sure I just saw Hyman Roth in the front row of the Miami game.
May 23rd
According to Reggie Miller, Chicago is having trouble with Miami’s “length” and “penetration”.
May 23rd
The Pope, The Queen, The Red Lobster...
May 23rd
Make you be craving for it nightly.
I’m pretty sure that there is some sort mind control happening with Red Lobster commercials. 
May 23rd
Can you handle truthbombs being set off in your...
May 23rd
The type of guy I am! Deal with it!
I’m the type of guy who just says it, you know. I just spell it out for you, no holds barred. Take no prisoners. I just go ahead and stuff some truth up your nose holes and pulls the righteousness out your ears. That’s me. It’s who I am. DEAL!
May 23rd
The Mysterialist: Everyone... →
mysterialist: … Who has blogged for any length of time has written one, including me, but could we do away once and for all with the pissy-ass, “THIS IS WHO I AM WORLD TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT I GOT A BUG UP MY BUTT” blog post? I’m not even referring to one I’ve read recently; they’re still just all over the… I’m the type of guy who likes this. How do you like them apples, world?
May 23rd
May 23rd
“I now think the odds are better than 50-50 that both Rick Perry and Paul Ryan...”
– Bill Kristol (via brooklynmutt) Way to go on a limb there, Bill!
May 23rd
12 notes
“It’s far from clear that Obama’s commitment to this outcome is...”
– Obama and the Israel Lobby - Israel - Salon.com Obama’s political self interest is everyone else’s own best interest.  Health care was a deeply held conviction wasn’t it? And that cost him almost as much political capital as it was possible to sacrifice. 
May 23rd
May 22nd
1,309 notes
People are outraged by the Rapture Preacher today. Like they wanted to wait to see if he was right.    
May 22nd
Beastie Boys: Bard visit →
officialbeastieboys: dear members of the message boards, thanks for the kind well wishes and congrats on the award. it was great to go back and visit bard and see some old friends….. as to the question of my being class of 1986,or graduating no i did not graduate i only went to school there for 2 years. my freshman… Steely Dan and the Ad Rock dropped out of Bard?
May 22nd
50 notes
I think Jesus might still be pissed at us.
May 22nd
kelsium: The answer is not to watch Reality Bites. Remember when people had the luxury of engaging in activities that are fireable offenses and then whining about getting fired? Yeah, neither do I. I was a college student in Houston when that came out. We all had to work jobs to pay for school and these fuckers were sitting around, emoing before emo was cool.  Plus, they wore jackets after...
May 22nd
File Grinder or Fish Monger. I knew I came from...
Surname origin and facts for skybarn skybarn: Variant of Polish and Jewish (eastern Ashkenazic) skybarnow Places of Origin Country# of immigrantsGermany Preussen Poland Top Occupations in 1880 File Grinder50% Fish Monger 50%
May 21st
I realized today that I’ve probably had a grass allergy my whole life. It’s not normal to itch for hours after touching grass?
May 21st
2 notes
People who call sports talk radio: You do realize those players who are “trash” and “awful” are playing at the highest level of their chosen field. You are not.
May 21st
wooliebear asked: Oh God, how could I forget the next line?!?

According to Wiki I have a few other selections:
The band also often name-checks drinks, typically alcoholic, in their songs: rum and cokes ("Daddy Don't Live in That New York City No More"), piña coladas ("Bad Sneakers"), zombies ("Haitian Divorce"), black cows ("Black Cow"),...
May 21st
Softball: It’s like someone said “How can we make baseball more boring?”
May 21st